I bought this book just after ending a relationship with an abusive alcoholic and narcissistic man. I didn't have any clarity on how or why his behaviours had impacted me, or how his abuse had so insidiously colonised my self-worth and emotional life. I needed language and structure to help me get a handle on why I had become so small. I needed to be able to describe him and his behaviours as abusive with confidence and clarity. This book really helped - the abuse I had experienced was directly recognisable in the examples given. Bancroft's book is clearly written and well laid-out. It offers strong support and comfort for abuse survivors through a sensible and experienced perspective. I recommend it highly.
An amazing read, so relevant and empowering for victims of emotional abuse. Recognized so many of the behaviors that I had been trying not to notice but my gut was telling me otherwise. This book made me realize a lot of things about my ex which I was previously not able to define or label. And most of all reinforced the decision I've made to leave an angry and controlling man. Fantastic read and I have been back over it many times, highlighting the relevant sections and phrases, to remind myself when I need reminding that it is not worth thinking about him anymore.
Following the demise of my 21-year marriage, this book made absolutely EVERYTHING crystal clear. It also gave me an insight into the male psyche in general. I feel better equipped to discover a person's true character, and not just rely on what people say.