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Deborah A. Lott

In Session: The Bond Between Women and Their Therapists Hardcover – 25 June 1999

by Deborah A. Lott (Author)

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This text takes a look at the dynamics of women in therapy. It goes beyond the usual condemnation of sexual transgressions in therapy to describe the complex range of women's feelings, fantasies, fears and beliefs integral to each woman's relationship with her therapist.

Print length

288 pages
Language

English
Publisher

W.H.Freeman & Co Ltd
Publication date

25 June 1999
Dimensions

16.51 x 2.54 x 25.4 cm
ISBN-10

0716735628
ISBN-13

978-0716735625
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Product details

Publisher ‏ : ‎ W.H.Freeman & Co Ltd (25 June 1999)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 288 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0716735628
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0716735625
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 16.51 x 2.54 x 25.4 cm

Customer Reviews:
32 ratings

About the author

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Deborah A. Lott

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Deborah A. Lott’s memoirs, essays, and reportage have been published in the Rumpus, Salon, the Alaska Quarterly Review, Bellingham Review, Black Warrior Review, Cimarron Review, Los Angeles Times, StoryQuarterly, the Good Men Project, the nervous breakdown, and many other places. Her family’s legacy of hypochondria was featured on NPR’s "This American Life."

Her first book, "In Session: the Bond between Women and their Therapists," offered an unprecedented look at psychotherapy from the perspective of clients interviewed by the author. Her essays have been thrice named as “notables of the year” by Best American Essays.

She teaches creative writing and literature at Antioch University, Los Angeles, where she serves as faculty advisor to TwoHawksQuarterly.com.

Further information can be found on her author website: https://deborahalott.com/

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2 star		13%
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Amazon Customer

Very worthwhile read

Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 31 August 2018

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This is essential reading for every woman in therapy. Can't recommend enough.

Falcon Lirica

The most helpful book ever written on the pain of falling in love with your therapist

Reviewed in the United States on 11 May 2016

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This is the most helpful book I've ever read about psychotherapy. Although there are many treatises on transference, I have never found anything that truly describes what it feels like from the client's point of view to fall in love with your therapist, and all of the distortions (and, unfortunately, abuses and breaches of ethics) that can develop as a result, from both sides. The description of the client-therapist interaction as an "approximate relationship" was immensely helpful in trying to make sense of a relationship that just isn't normal or easily understood. The reminder that the longed-for LOVE is mostly a fantasy that must be relinquished was tremendously powerful for me in helping me to in fact do so. The only thing I wish was further addressed is how agonizing it is to be obsessed day and night by the image of a person you can't have. Thank you, Deborah Lott, for writing this fabulous book. I passed it on to my therapist so that he might finally understand what I have been suffering.

4 people found this helpful

Jodi

Amazing

Reviewed in the United States on 16 May 2012

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I'm adding to this because I feel others should know specifically how this book helped me. I went through a very difficult time with my therapist, including many boundary transgressions that left me very confused and with no one to turn to because our therapy had to end because we had become too close personally. I felt alone and very strange for the many feelings I was having and felt very odd indeed. When I read this book, it was amazing to see that I was not alone in the many feelings I had in reaction to this experience. I had been reading many many books looking for something that could help me. I even read text books trying to understand what was happening to me emotionally. It was only the words of these other women that spoke to me, because many of them experienced similar thoughts and feelings, even if their experience wasn't exactly the same.

This book really nails the therapeutic relationship by describing a variety of reactions to therapy, including erotic transference and feelings involved in boundary transgressions. It is no doubt a book that therapists should read to better understand their clients and a book clients should read that are having difficulty understanding the wide array of feelings that manifest themselves during therapy. Because it comes from the perspective of many different clients, it is a nice sampling if experiences. I bought a copy and had it sent to a therapist who is a friend of mine. It should be required reading for students with the ambition of becoming therapists.

8 people found this helpful

Marge

best book on the psychotherapy relationship i've ever read...

Reviewed in the United States on 10 February 2011

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"Should be required reading for anyone in the field of Psychotherapy. Therapists & Clients would find a more meaningful relationship if they were made aware of the discoveries written about in this book. It would open up dialogging between therapist & client to discuss transference & relieve the shame of having deep feelings develop in the relationship. It also gives clear observations of what is a healthy & ethical therapeutic relationship & when it's time to end the relationship. There should be no sexual relationship with your client during or after the ending of treatment. There is a two year period of time when any contact should be made & under most circumstances no romantic connections should be acted upon after that two year period of time. This book is filled with so much information written after extensive interviews with clients & therapists & those in the field of Psychotherapy. It is thorough & the best book written on the subject of the relationships that develop during psychotherapy between the client and her therapist. I am rereading it b/c it is that good & there is so much material covered. If you are thinking of going into therapy I highly recommend this book to give you a better understanding of what to expect & how to handle the course of your own therapy."

6 people found this helpful

Amazon Customer

this book is so informative!

Reviewed in the United States on 7 October 2007

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I was looking for readings on "boundaries" in psychotherapeutic relationship. Well, I didn't really understand why my therapist insisted so much on keeping boundaries between her and me. I didn't see any problems having conversations over coffee if I happened to run into her outside of therapy. I didn't have any fantasies about finding where she lives, seeking her out, but I didn't see any harms to have a socially friendly relationship with her either. Sounded like very bad ideas from my therapist standpoint. Felt like we would jeopardize all our hard work in therapy if we socialized outside of the "sanctity of the office"! Anyway, I was interested in learning what these "boundaries" stuffs were all about from someone outside of our relationship. This book not only answered my questions on boundaries, but also gave insight into all aspects of relationship between women and their therapist. Wow, what a complicated world! My hat is off to Deborah for writing this book so candidly, attributing no shame to the patients for their feelings, sexual or not. My therapist is a wonderful woman, full of compassion and warm caring for me. She's genuinely listening to me with empathy. I gradually progressed towards a complete trust in her. I told her all my shameful secrets I never told any therapists before. I found myself adoring her like a kid. Yet, despite our wonderful therapeutic relationship, I still wondered if I was weird or some thing. This book helps me to understand my attachment to my therapist and don't feel ashamed about it. It helps me not feeling "weird" about my "child-like longings" for a motherly figure in her. It strengthens my trusting in her and in myself to work out my problems. I would recommend this book to anyone who has any interest in psychotherapy, patients or therapists.

10 people found this helpful

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In Session: The Bond Between Women and Their Therapists Hardcover – 25 June 1999

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Deborah A. Lott

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