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Clean by [Kerick, Mia]
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Length: 308 pages Word Wise: Enabled Enhanced Typesetting: Enabled
Page Flip: Enabled Language: English

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Product Description

Product Description

High school senior Lanny Keating has it all. A three-sport athlete at Lauserville High School looking at a college football scholarship, with a supportive family, stellar grades, boy band good looks… until the fateful day when it all falls apart.
Seventeen-year-old Trevor Ladd has always been a publicly declared zero and the high school badboy. Abandoned by his mother and sexually abused by his legal guardian, Trevor sets his sights on mere survival.

Lanny seeks out Trevor’s companionship to avoid his shattered home life. Unwilling to share their personal experiences of pain, the boys explore ways to escape, leading them into sexual experimentation, and the abuse of illegal drugs and alcohol. Their mutual suffering creates a lasting bond of friendship and love.

When the time finally comes to get clean and sober, or flunk out of high school, only one of the boys will graduate, while the other spirals downward into addiction.
Will Lanny and Trevor find the strength to battle their demons of mind-altering substances as well as emotional vulnerability?

Clean takes the reader on a gritty trip into the real and raw world of teenage substance abuse.

Product details

  • Format: Kindle Edition
  • File Size: 2284 KB
  • Print Length: 308 pages
  • Page Numbers Source ISBN: 1517581044
  • Simultaneous Device Usage: Unlimited
  • Publisher: YoungDudes Publishing; 1 edition (1 December 2015)
  • Sold by: Amazon Australia Services, Inc.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B016AUC2HM
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Enabled
  • Enhanced Typesetting: Enabled
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #223,937 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews on (beta) HASH(0xb3504ba0) out of 5 stars 25 reviews
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful
HASH(0xb2ecd8b8) out of 5 stars Just, wow. Amazing, harrowing, enlightening. Wow. 4 December 2015
By V. Rundell of V's Reads - Published on
Format: Kindle Edition
This book is a very tough read, not because it's written poorly, but because it portrays unflinching stories of sexual abuse, neglect and substance abuse in teens.

Landon was a great student and star athlete with everything going for him until his young sister was hit by a car. She survived, but with severe handicaps, and Lanny's family has become all about Joelle and her care. His overwhelmed and overwrought parents are angry and hostile, and don't even bother to acknowledge Lanny most days. Lanny and his parents share guilt and blame for the tragedy of Joelle's accident, and Lanny takes it super hard. He turns to alcohol to hide his pain, and he gets his alcohol from the school bad-boy, Trevor.

Trevor is a burn out. He lives each day in fear, and resignation, of the continuing sexual abuse he's endured since he was twelve and his mother abandoned him with her friend, Carl. When he can, Trevor seeks oblivion via alcohol and pot. And Lanny, the angel-faced "clean" boy that sometimes lurks in Carl's gardening shed with him. When they are drunk, it's easy to seek other releases, and Trevor's easily able to direct some impersonal (non-penetrative) sex between them.

Lanny feels like Trevor's the only person in his life who sees him. Trevor's too afraid to love anyone, and doesn't believe he's worthy of love, in any case. That said, he sees how far Lanny is slipping--he's been kicked off the football team, he's failing classes and he spends every night getting bombed. Soon they move on to pills, supplied by a mutual friend. Trevor knows his only way out of Carl's lecherous grasp is death, or cleaning up and graduating high school. He tries to get Lanny to clean out, too, but Lanny's not having it.

Expect things to get worse. Expect there to be real terror on the pages, especially for Trevor when he discovers just how far gone Lanny is.

This story is a story of redemption. It is an honest and harrowing tale of hitting rock bottom, and surviving. The first half is the descent, and the second half is the rise, and it's not an easy road on either side. Yet, it was told brilliantly, with Lanny rediscovering himself, and his family becoming a strong and supportive unit again. Lanny does what Trevor can't--forgive himself. And his recovery is well-defined in the general Twelve Step way. This may be a YA tale, but the truth of it applies to people at all ages and stages.

It is also an M/M tale--a dash of romance. Lanny is definitely attracted to Trevor, and acknowledges that he is gay. Trevor was not sure of his orientation--he's not attracted to Carl in the least--but he does acknowledge that he's attracted to Lanny, and feels the most love for him that he has of any of the few people who've been in his life. There is some sexuality on the page--most consensual, some abuse. Both are told honestly and without glorification.

Part of Lanny's recovery is making amends for his use and abuse of Trevor, who is dumbstruck that Lanny feels any need to apologize. Trevor's been mired in guilt over ever giving Lanny any substances to abuse in the first place. Lanny's steadfast determination to be a real friend to Trevor, not an escape, allows both boys to come to terms with the ills of their past. I adored how very healthy all of this was, and how it engendered a real and beneficial relationship.

At no point did I feel there was any shortcut or glossing over of the tragedy and healing in this story. I think the writing was excellent, if unconventional. Trevor's POV pages are especially fraught with his fragmented internal narrative. He's contrary and cagey, and always looking to defend himself and his emotions by denying them. He's honest with Lanny about being a liar--having hidden so much of himself, never believing that anyone could (or would) want to help him--that he is dirty, filthy, unlovable and unwholesome because of his abuse. It made for a very poignant counterpoint to Lanny's squeaky-clean, but detached family.

I always struggle to read books that feature abuse of a minor, because I'm a mom, and I hate that this happens IRL. Reading is my escape from MY everyday problems, in many cases, so I prefer the lighter fare. That said, an intense read like CLEAN serves a very important purpose in highlighting the experiences of people who are very different, and often very troubled. CLEAN is fantastic. I hope that it finds readers who have the courage, like Lanny and Trevor, to be present and be counted. To not give up, and to do the hard work necessary to do better than just survive the experience.

Lanny and Trevor discover that life is hard, but very very worth it.
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful
HASH(0xb2ecddbc) out of 5 stars Brilliantly written. 1 December 2015
By johanna - Published on
Format: Kindle Edition
cannot give this anything lower than five stars and Clean is definitely a Must Read. However, I must warn readers: this is not for everyone. There are triggers everywhere and it is raw. It bleeds in it's rawness, probably the reason why this is rated so high and deservedly so.

As a mother, Mia Kerick has her children always at the back of her thoughts and they are revealed in her stories. Clean delves on a topic that may be considered as one of a mother's worst nightmare. No mother wants their children to get into drug addiction.

Lanny and Trevor are young teenaged men who went down that way. Drug addiction not only attacks the body in betraying it to crave for a substance, but it also betrays the mind. No matter how logical or intelligent a brain is, it can be fooled by traitorous substances. Some worse than others.

For such a heavy, drama, angst-ridden story line, this reads clean. Not meant as a pun, but it is a clean story. No lumps, no bumps, (excepting a few typos as I do base this read on an ARC so is not considered retail perfect) and flows fast. There is no hesitation to the telling, which made this read easier than it really was.

Overall, Clean is not for everyone. It is not for me. But I do recommend it as I recognize the need for extraordinary stories out there.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
HASH(0xbb1d321c) out of 5 stars A Multi-Faceted Story of Teen Drug Use 3 December 2015
By D. Donovan - Published on
Format: Kindle Edition
Teens receive messages about the dangers of drugs from a range of media and social interactions, but often there is still the promise that ingesting a drug will mitigate psychological pain and overwhelming emotions. Attracted to drugs because of their confusing, evolving feelings, many a young adult falls into the drug world, never to emerge.

While Clean opens with a preface about this subject, it chooses the novel format (not nonfiction) to deliver its hard-hitting message about why teens choose drugs and what happens when they try to erase the harsh realities of their environments by creating an artificial inner bliss.

The first thing to note about Clean is that it's a psychological examination; not a thriller piece. Where other books would focus on drug-taking events and interactions between individuals, Clean tasks its characters with something different: revealing their motivations and emotions

A prologue opens with Lanny's latest drug of choice (a common household item) but then moves backwards in time, five months earlier, to where his hookup with a male classmate is ending. Perspectives switch between the two boys, and readers are treated to gritty observations that punctuate stiff language with gritty insights.

Sex, drugs, school and home pressures, and changed home lives: Clean mixes its drug experiences with messages about the different kinds of pressures teens experience, how they perceive and handle them, and the temptation to flee (however temporarily) life's realities. It also reveals how taking drugs alters not only their experiences and awareness, but affects the reactions of others who react differently to the changed behaviors of a person high on drugs.

All this is wrapped in a plot that moves back and forth through time in clearly-marked chapter headings, charting changing encounters from home life to the wider world, and surveys how kids stumble onto the wrong path and how they come clean.

What does it mean to be and stay clean; to live a drug-free life confronting all one's demons past, present and future without the mitigating aid of a chemical? Add an ongoing romance between two boys who struggle with different aspects and impacts of love and drugs and you have a very different story than most: a hard-hitting, street-wise series of encounters that don't let up and which stay true to the sexual and social milieu of teen life.

Supplement these insights with parents' perceptions of their children and you have a multi-faceted story that, more so than most, hones in on the reasons for staying sober or choosing chemicals in a story fueled by the contrast between a star athlete who chooses drugs and the efforts of a 'loser' to escape his destiny.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
HASH(0xbb1d30e4) out of 5 stars Brilliant story 6 December 2015
By Philomena(Cheekypee) - Published on
Format: Kindle Edition
This is the first book I've read by this author and what a way to start. I was bowled over by the realness of this story.
If your looking for a romantic sweet read then I suggest you skip this book.

This is the raw and gritty story of two teenagers Lanny and Trevor. Due to an accident Lannys home life is messed up. He feels so alone at home and at school. Trevor has been abandoned by his mom and is abused by his legal guardian. They both end up together meddling and trying alcohol and drugs. This leads them both to self destruct. While one gets professional help the other struggles on.

Can they move on and help each other to heal?

The first half of the book is pretty gritty. We hear of what's going on in both their lives. The second half is about healing and forgiveness. I thought the author did a great job with this story as its not an easy subject to write about.

As a mum I'd love for my kids to read this book. I think teenagers would learn so much from it. As I read this I felt the emotions as part of the story was real to me.

I'll certainly be reading more of this authors books. Great read.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
HASH(0xb2ecdae0) out of 5 stars Every parent should read this book 3 December 2015
By Mollien Osterman Alpha Book Club - Published on
Format: Kindle Edition
5 Weeping Stars

This was a very difficult book for me to read. I am a mother of five wonderful children. Correction adults. The youngest being 19. The author doesn’t hold back and although this book is a work of fiction, so many people lose themselves to addiction making this a powerful enlightening story .
This book takes us on the downward spiral of two teens trying to escape the horror that is their lives. We see them struggle and hit rock bottom as they try to dull their pain with drugs, alcohol and any other means of escape. In all their struggles they manage to form a relationship/friendship.
Although this is a great book to read, I can not say that I enjoyed it. It is hard to enjoy something so tragic, but I feel it is a book that every parent should read and then take a good hard look at what is going on in the lives of their children. Something that in this book Lanny’s parents didn’t do until it was almost too late.

ARC Provided by the author through Alpha Book Club. Honest review done by Mollien, for Alpha Book Club without influence from publisher or author.