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Boys Will Be Boys: Power, patriarchy and the toxic bonds of mateship Kindle Edition
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- ASIN : B07DWZBCPY
- Publisher : Allen & Unwin (26 September 2018)
- Language : English
- File size : 895 KB
- Text-to-Speech : Enabled
- Enhanced typesetting : Enabled
- X-Ray : Not Enabled
- Word Wise : Enabled
- Print length : 304 pages
- Best Sellers Rank: 40,066 in Kindle Store (See Top 100 in Kindle Store)
- Customer Reviews:
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Top reviews from Australia
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I suppose that over time I have come to understand that one of the 'rights' of being in a privileged group - and I'm white and middle-class in Australia, so on the world measure I'm pretty damn lucky - is the 'right' not to have to think about it: not think about why things are as they are, who benefits from that and how, who loses out from it and how, and whether that requires me to do something different. And whether the overall effect is to harm society as a whole. I know I am lazy and don't do a lot of what I really should - I don't always think carefully about things, I haven't revolutionised my life over climate change, given my last dollar to lower socio-economic groups, or housed the homeless in my own town, and so forth - but some of those things are really hard and there isn't always a good solid basis for what would be effective. But I have seen that gender (and other baseless forms of ) discrimination does cause harm to women, men and children, and if thinking about things a bit more and changing how I do a few things will ensure that my nephew never gets himself into this kind of trouble or damages his relationships or gets suicidal or suffers a friend's suicide and my niece (or, being less 'tribal' - anyone else's children) faces less of that and hopeless double-binds less often than she would otherwise, then it's definitely worth feeling slightly uncomfortable about how my part in society may have perpetuated a few significant problems. This book can help you think. Not, I hasten to add, replace the need for you to think by indoctrinating you with femi-nazi ideas, but give you a few new perspectives to consider.
There was one bit I found terribly depressing, which was a listing out of famous or powerful men who were accused of things like sexual assault, and the consequences they experienced. Or, more accurately, the almost entire lack of negative consequences over the rest of their careers. It really did suggest that we have a long way to go before we deal effectively with people who do harmful things to others, and that a lot of the 'backlash' against gender equality moves may be about people not liking to have to feel uncomfortable and think about things, rather than having a good basis for their complaints.
Clem passionately outlines the dangerous, deeply damaging reality of toxic masculinity, and illustrates how these harmful "gender norms", and sexist ideas, hurt everyone. She also backs up what she is saying by providing plenty of relevant studies and data.
As I read example after example, I felt a plethora of emotions, ranging from sadness, anger, rage, fear, and, also, hope - hope because there are people like Clem, standing up against the nonsense we have all been brainwashed with since birth, and genuinely trying to dismantle those structures to make a safer, balanced, and truly equal world for everyone.
Healthy masculinity, that doesn't shy away from being caring, soft, and gentle, is a truly beautiful (and natural) thing, and I am sure this book will reach those people - especially men - who chose to let their guard down, and examine the facts.
Thank you Clem, again, for another exceptional, passionate, and absolutely vital book. It could not be more apt.
This woman is insightful, loving, funny, impassioned...... just read it!!!
Top reviews from other countries
After reading this book and seeing the repulsive abuse the author is subject to by men who seem to take personal offence from the idea of equality, I see how much work there is to do.
This book will give you the hope, language and inspiration to start that work. I want to live in the world Clementine is fighting for.